Player Profiles

BARELY ATHLETIC PLAYER PROFILES

STEVE “ZANNUSSI” PINNELL
Position: Midfield / Forward
Age range 35-50

A technically brilliant goalkeeper. His great size belies his agility and cat-like reflexes. Stands up well with safe hands and he dominates his box. Unfortunately plays right wing.




IOAN ‘NOBBY’ WILLIAMS
Position: Forward / Right Back
Age range 35-50

A recent convert from attack to defence he brings all the strikers guile to showing opposing forwards the way to goal. Longstanding Chairman of the board who has survived numerous disinterested attempts to oust him.




QUENTIN “FORTESCUE” ALSOPP
Position: Midfield / Defence
Age range 35-50

Skilful, fast and occasionally furious. A player of great vision (despite the specs). Reads the game beautifully and organises those around him. An integral part of the team when his wife, Katherine, lets him play.



PHIL “THE ENFORCER” WALSH
Position: Defence
Age range 35-50

Carved from granite with pointy elbows and very big boots. Not renowned for his speed but gets there as quick as he can and makes an impression. Steadfast and resolute in defence.



JOHN ‘SUNSHINE’ OVERFIELD
Position: Goalkeeper
Age range 35-50

A popular member of the team, which has nothing to do with his willingness to go in goal. Frequently our last line of defence and occasionally our only line of defence, John's ballet like grace in goal belies his thuggish appearance.




NICK “STRIKER” AMBLER
Position: Utility
Age range 35-50


Winner for several years of ‘Most Extravagant Claim of the Season’ Award that of ‘I’m a goal a game man’. Happy playing up front even when selected at right back. Versatile utility player and team historian/statistician. True clubman.



MANROUF “THIERRY” CHANFI
Position: Midfield / Forward
Age range 35-50

One of our overseas mercenaries. Plays with typical Gallic commitment. If he can be arsed. Fleet of foot and gob. His tastes in world music much like his football talent - wide, patchy and decidedly odd with occasional flashes of class.

JERRY “THE GENERAL” GYDE
Position: Libero / Sweeper
Age range 35-50

Manager , strategist, tactician, motivator. A rapier amongst broadswords. Stylish with more than a hint of Continental flair and a rock solid sweeper. Or so he keeps telling us. He really does go on!

“BATTLING” BOB LYNNE
Position: Forward
Age range 35-50

A player of great skill and passion. A bit too much really. Likes to beat a player several times just to make sure. Enjoys conversations with both the opposition and the Ref. Back to full form now he’s had both knees replaced.