If we could just sort out those tricky first 65 minutes

Bathelona 7 Barely Athletic 1

Goal: Tom

Defence: Batts, Ian, Danny

Midfield: Scott, Paul L, Jacko, Chris S, Mike, Sam

Attack: Adam

Subs: Cristoph, Paul T, Colin

The rate Barely are going, in a couple of years this won't be a football blog but a support group. The 2012-13 season was spent reeling around like a boxer on his last legs, only to land three lucky punches in the final round. Now, as they enter the 13-14 season, he's managed to fall out of the ring and land on one of those plastic chairs.

Today's game was a farce in more ways than one. First off, Bathelona neglected to tell anybody they didn't play their games in Bath any more, so the Barely squad made an unnecessary trip to the city of sandstone only to find out they were expected in Keynsham. Bathelona's defence was that the venue had "been up on their website" for some time. However it transpired that none of the Barely number had thought to check, as they were busy with jobs and families and things like that. Everyone made a mental note to change their homepage, so when next year the fixture is scheduled in Ogbourne St George's School for the Terminally Absent-Minded they would know in advance, rather than having to rely on that classically thorny method of communication, telepathy.

Anyway here they were, trotting out in Jacko's experimental 3-6-1 line up with Wednesday regular Scott making his debut at right wing-back and Sam on the left. Jacko flooded the midfield with four more bodies including Sam's mate Chris, who helps out about once every four years. Adam was left to plough a solitary furrow in attack.

It started badly. Barely were struggling to get nodding terms with new personnel and formation when Bathelona, who began brightly, knocked in a couple of goals to acknowledge their ascendency. One was decent, the other an unlucky ricochet off a post, onto Tom's back and straight to the feet of an attacker.

There was a hasty reshuffle. So far Barely had been less a well-oiled machine than a well-oiled but hastily-arranged office party. Jacko changed to four at the back, keeping five in midfield, and brought on Cristoph for Mike. The team - stirred up by a succession of Ian's challenges - consolidated, reaching half-time with the game still potentially rescuable at 2-0.

At this point there was no sense of what was to come. Barely were like the innocent blonde in the opening of Jaws, running naively into the sea, unaware of the torture and eventual footballing death to come. Admittedly the shark had already scored two goals, so perhaps she could have stayed on the land, but unfortunately for the team there is no refusing to go back in the water. I.e. on the pitch.

It's been a long day.

The second half unfolded like a bleak Wagnerian opera. Wave after wave of Bathelona attacks came at them, and despite some real heroics from the defence - Tom in particular - as a unit Barely didn't seem able to deny them space. Bathelona's football was very good, and even better was their finishing. Tom in his most inspired form had no chance against some superbly-placed shots, and even less against an attempted cross that sailed into top corner. The lucky gets.

It got so one lost count. It got so Bathelona actually volunteered to discard a goal that the ref was happy to let stand. Actually he was happy to let most things stand, though the game by and large didn't suffer for it. In the midst of all this Jacko took himself off and made space on the left wing for Paul Tovey, who showed his usual deft touches and composure. But Barely were playing on the deck as the ship sank.

The last 15 minutes loomed and perhaps Bathelona took their foot off the gas a little. Certainly Barely kept trying, none more so than Adam, whose sheer effort alone was enough to get him man of the match (Chris S, Paul L and Sam as one-vote runners-up in a landslide). Chris set off on a run down the inside right, surging past a couple of challenges and into the box to fling a cross to Adam. Adam's header was straight and true, but sadly inches wide of the post.

Adam returned the favour for Chris with a neat set-up and his belted finished cannoned off the cross-bar. Surely Barely deserved something from this? They got it in the end - from the sheer persistence of Paul Loftus, who in a sustained period of yelling and shoving forced the keeper into his own net as he leapt to catch the ball. It shouldn't have stood, but at that point the ref probably felt sorry for Barely.

Time was called and Barely adjourned to the bar. The tone was surprisingly upbeat considering the hiding they had, but there is work ahead if this is not to be another season of successive six-pointers.

Blue Monday

Barely Athletic 3 - 4 Easton Monday

Under darkening skies the Barely Boys took the field with a spring in their step, lining up:

                   Tom
Scott, Ian, Danny, Batts, Colin                        Paul T (lino)
    Rich C, Jacko, Pilot Paul                              
        me (Adam), Chris

The theory was that the full-backs would bomb on, overwhelming the midfield but Barely had a slow start and would have been two down in the first five without some very generous play from the Monday striker. Colin pulled up early bringing Paul T into the game.

Spending the first twenty minutes under the cosh Barely fought back with Rich and PP taking control of the midfield, with strong help from Scott and Ian majestic at the back, and with their confidence growing Chris ran onto a through ball from your narrator and skipped along the edge of the six-yard box, defenders cowering, before delicately passing into the corner.

Ten minutes later a Rich C cross was cleared out to the D of the penalty box from where Jacko whacked it into the far corner ("I just passed it in"). Two-nil up without playing well, we wondered what would happen when we did click?

At half time the rain strengthened to downpour status but after some rousing words from Danny Barely came out strong with PP whacking the ball home after some pinball involving Paul T in the box. But that was as good as it got. 

Monday pulled one back soon after as the slippy ball evaded Tom. Five minutes later we turned attack into defence with astonishing speed and a free header at the far post gave Tom no chance. We then held on gamely for twenty mins with Tom called into action time after time, then Chris sprinted through 1-on-1 with the keeper, not told he had time he shot against the shins when he could have gone around. Soon after I volleyed agonizingly over from the penalty spot after a neat flick from Scott (who was a constant menace down the right in every sense of the word).

Almost inevitably the slippery ball caused the equaliser and then winner, and in spite of throwing everything at them for the last ten minutes (I wouldn't have wanted to get in Batts way as he marauded down the wing, but somehow they did) and it just wasn't to be.

Can we put it down to a lack of fitness, or missing the rotation that a couple more subs would have allowed?

Due to running around and shouting a lot I got Man of the Match, but it doesn't reduce the sting...

Twelfth Man

AXA 4 - 1 Barely Athletic

Goal: Tom
Defence: Colin, Ian, Batts, Sam
Midfield: Richie, Jacko, Paul, Mike
Attack: Adam, later joined by Nick

For most teams the twelfth man is the crowd. For Barely there were numerous suspects, some of them at work, others hungover or unwilling to respond to pained pleas. It was very nearly a ten-man Barely taking on AXA, but thankfully Nick Ambler answered the call. One can only imagine what the scoreline against an outnumbered Barely would have been.

Almost by default Jacko took charge of the line-up, such as it was. Barely's popular and successful 3-5-2 had to be shelved as at kick-off Nick was clambering into his car in Bishopston. Barely reverted to a 4-4-1 with Adam leading a one-man line. And despite the numerical disadvantage Barely began well, or well enough to suggest perhaps they could scrape a penalty shoot-out of the day. The back line was regularly under pressure but at this early stage it did not seem a goal was imminent. Instead it was Barely who somewhat surprisingly took the lead. When Adam was felled 25 yards out the referee - somewhat charitably perhaps - blew for a free-kick. Richie's kick had pace and a bit of swerve, but it was more a combination of keeper error and the skiddiness of the ball that saw it ping into the net of the keeper's attempted save.

As if woken from a torpor, AXA began slicing through Barely at will and within five minutes had surged to a 2-1 lead. First Barely were guilty of some serial non-challenges as an AXA midfielder slalomed his way from the halfway line into the box, where he beat Tom with a low shot to the far post. Then lady luck pulled up her skirts and shat on Batts from on high, as his wellied clearance cannoned off the back of an attacker and over Tom's dive - into the net.

Lesser teams than Barely would have crumbled like a time-lapsed cake in the desert. But of course Barely do not crumble - at least, not today. Instead they staggered and swayed and eventually flailed as AXA pretty much dominated the rest of the game. Adam did an admirable job of running the line but despite Barely's strong midfield the key element of fresh legs - criminally missed in the periodic table - was absent, and it showed. AXA - probably fitter in the main anyway - had the luxury of three subs to choose from, though they were unlucky in losing their midfield general in the second half.

Their key player though was probably their shaven-headed centre-back who comfortably snuffed out almost everything Barely could muster. The closest they came was a snap-shot from Richie (set up by Adam) flying just wide of the post, and a hooked effort by Sam from a corner that was sadly too close to the keeper.

Barely kept going, for while the goal seemed out of sight with the score at 2-1 at least there was a chink of possibility. But that door slammed shit with two identi-goals in the second half - balls flung over from the right and despatched with ease.

With the third the jig was up; and the fourth just rubbed Barely's noses in it really. Despite the score and result though Barely have reasons to be positive - Batts last-ditch tackles, Colin's obduracy, Adam's seemingly bottomless depths of energy... it could be a decent league season. Richie beat them all out for man of the match - he'll get a statue at this rate - but though Barely leave the field with aching limbs and sunken hearts, it was not a day for lowered heads. Add a couple more players to this team and it will be very competitive.

A night for B team

Barely's belated end-of-season bash was arranged, cajoled, and wrangled by Rich Batten, who managed to somehow coax a dozen members away from their couches/locals/partners/slumbers on the same night; to the Swan Inn, Conham.

It was a real pleasure to see old boys Ioan and Lee in attendance, and indeed they formed part of the first team in the competition for the night: Skittles. Barely A consisted of the aforementioned along with Lewis, Jim, Adam, Nick, and Batts himself.

Barely B was made up of Colin, Jacko, Mike, Paul T, Ian and Sam.

here they are

There wasn't a huge amount of variation in technique from a collection of skittling amateurs, but it's probably accurate to say that in a packed field of pacemen, Lee took the prize for fastest deliveries - they proved too fast for the shutter speed on your correspondent's camera, anyway, and generated some mean elevation on impact.

Fire in the hole!

Early on it looked like Jim might run away with the wooden spoon with his opening scores of 3, 2, and 1 - but Sam was going to have something to say about that. Meanwhile Paul Tovey arrived a little late and pitched in with something approaching ball control - he was the only person generating spin as, by and large, velocity seemed to be the preferred choice.

brown blur is the ball - multicoloured blur is Ioan

But the high-scorers weren't actually the speed merchants - most consistent performers on the night were medium-pacers Colin (32 first round) and Jacko (28 second round).

Lewis couldn't help dancing with joy

Meanwhile Sam was entertaining the troops with some serially awful skittling, seemingly intent on sending the balls either into the gutters or sailing serenely through the gaps between pins. He started round two with an inconceivable two ducks in a row.

Barely A had tied up the first round with a convincing 6-point victory, but there was no stopping Barely B in the second round - they grabbed the lead early on and gripped it like limpets. Skittle-playing limpets.

And their 7-point victory in round two, led by cavalry performances from Mike, Colin and Jacko,  infantry back-up from Ian and Paul and comedy relief by Sam, handed them the narrowest of victories overall, defeating Barely A 281 points to 280.

A very entertaining session - for a variety of reasons - was concluded with kudos and big thanks to Batts for being on the case and running the show. Next time: Table Football?

Whistling Dixie

Nailsea Old Boys 5 Barely Athletic 1

Goal: Tom

Defence: Batts, Danny, Ian

Midfield: Adam, Richie, Mike, Paul Loftus, Sam

Attack: Jim, Chris

Subs: Colin, Nick, Paul Tovey, Andy

*

Sometimes things are written in the stars - you're destined to be with a particular person, you're going to land that job, you win the office sweepstake or wander into co-op on the very day they're doing a special on wet-wipes (as happened to your correspondent today. Buy one, get two free!)

But Huggies aside this wasn't one of those days. Barely, for all their efforts, couldn't find a way to deny Nobs a win. And to be fair the home team deserved it; but it was soured by an unsympathetic refereeing display that licensed the glossy scoreline.

Nobs had won their last two games by landslide scorelines and needed three points to claim the championship. Barely had won their last three games after a miserable 3/4 of the season, and needed to stop them if Retainers were to be crowned. And the start of the game was fairly even: for the first ten or fifteen minutes it was a box-to-box affair, even if neither side were able to make the goalkeepers do more than yell instructions. Then the tempo changed as Nobs superior football eased them into a position of slight control. Only slight though; Barely adjusted their game to defending as high up as they could - tricky when playing a sweeper - and trying to hit Nobs on the counter.

It nearly paid dividends. Chris set off on one of his Beagrie-esque runs, feinting this way and that as the rest of the team pleaded with him to pass. Eventually the ball did break to Sam, lurking in the penalty box, and from an oblique angle he brought a good reaction save from the keeper. Nothing came of the corner, and shortly afterward Tom was called on too, blocking a shot from point blank range as Nobs started to rack up the corner count.

However Barely were disgruntled by the goal when it came, as Paul Loftus having won the ball in his own half was cynically hacked down from behind. The referee gave nothing (later saying he could have given a free kick for Paul's own challenge, as though the ref's job is to run a tab rather than actually police the game) and moments later a Nobs effort on goal went under Tom's despairing dive.

Half-time and the whole team felt there was at least a point to be had here. Nobs were as expected assured on the ball and physical - not unfairly so - off it, but their defence didn't exactly have a hermetic seal, as both Jim and Chris had found space and been able to worm their way past challenges.

Andy, Nick, Paul T and Colin all came on as Danny stuck with the Barely ethos and rang the changes. The biggest loss however was Paul Loftus, who had to dash off (in some striking underwear) to work. Sam moved into centre-midfield but it goes without saying he did not supply the same physical presence as Paul. And as the second half began there was a stark contrast to the fine edges of the first - Nobs were undoubtedly on top. But for the goal itself - well, perhaps the ref didn't see a Nobs attacker pulling Tom's arm down as he attempted to catch the ball on his own line. Refs have missed worse than that. But he certainly saw Barely's own cast-iron penalty minutes later as Andy - again having a real impact from the bench - was scythed down with the ball untouched. Barely were up in arms and in this case it's hard to find an 'out' for the ref. There was no other reading of the incident available.

Jim was doing his best to work the Nobs keeper as Barely sought to find a way through, but both goalkeepers were having a good game. Then disaster: Ian chopped down a Nobs attacker in the box and again it was a stonewall pen. This time the ref gave it, and although Tom saved the ball fell kindly to the penalty taker who lofted over everyone into the roof of the net.

Three-nil and sense of inevitability hung over the game like a bad fart. But of course Barely - refereeing issues aside - aren't sulkers when the scoreline looks bad, and through persistence they won a goal back; Jim's speared cross thumped in by the forehead of Paul Tovey.

But it was a mere roadside bag of crisps on the highway to hell, as in the space of minutes Nobs added two more - uncontestable - goals; a goalmouth scramble knocked in from inches and then a deft side-foot steered in from ten yards at the far post. In the middle of the hot sun, the physical game, the disdain for the ref, Barely had other reasons to be grateful the season was finally over: Colin and Ian limped off and Adam and Sam both took knocks.

Barely kept going and both Jim and Andy pulled out good saves from keeper, who had done his bit at keeping Nobs on top. The whistle finally went on a deserved triumph for Nobs and Barely were able to hold their heads high on a very good first half performance - the second was, if not exactly a whimper, the kind of bang you can safely hold indoors.

Paul Loftus' first half performance was enough to get him in the voting for Man of the Match - Richie, Andy, Chris and Jim all featured too, but in the end Adam (3 votes) ran out a close second behind Tom (4 votes) who had been desperately unlucky with the penalty and pulled off three or four other blinders.

With Danny adamant that he doesn't want the boss's role next season however, this will be a summer of transition for Barely. Particularly Chris, who is embarking on some mad fitness scheme in order to compete in 'Tough Mudder' - and announced his intention to score 20 goals next season. He didn't specify which end though.

The Great Escape - apparently.

Barely Athletic 4 - 1 Cardiff Accies

Goal: Tom
Defence: Batts, Danny, Ian G
Midfield: Adam, Richie, Jacko, Paul T, Paul L
Attack: Jim S, Chris

Subs: Andy, Colin, Sam

On the day when Sir Alex Ferguson retired his mind-bending wristwatch, most of the media focus was at Old Trafford. But at Keynsham a great drama was being played out, as Barely Athletic won their third game in a row in style, after a season of staggering from one defeat to another.

What this means seems to be open to interpretation, however, as nobody in the press box could work out from the various permutations of plausible outcomes whether it made Barely definitively, categorically safe. There hasn't been this much confusion over whether it was The Great Escape or not since Mr Forgetful opened a cinema and invited Blur to a premiere directed by Steve McQueen (the other one). But if this wonderful silver lining has a dark cloud nestled within, for now at least Barely can reflect that they have given themselves more than a fighting chance. Not so long ago the writing was on the wall; now it's being scrubbed off by white-collar criminals repaying the community.

As regular readers know, Barely don't believe in doing things the easy way, so despite a line-up tailored to negate the burly physique of the Accies, they began slightly on the back foot, looking flummoxed by the purposeful opening by the visitors. But before long they worked their way into the game, and started engineering chances in the opposition box.

But perhaps due to the bobbly pitch there was a marked reluctance to let rip, with both Richie and Jim looking oddly goal-shy. Chris meanwhile was turning the defence inside out on regular occasions but collectively Barely couldn't seem to find the killer ball. And then an Accies attack was cleared only as far as the visiting left-winger, who promptly let fly a deft chip from 25 yards into the Barely net. One-nil down and Barely had it all to do. Initially it was Accies back on top, but like a Romero zombie Barely simply don't know when they're dead, and they worked themselves into a leading position before the break after Jim set up Adam for the equaliser before giving Barely the lead himself.

At half-time Danny rang the changes, bringing on all three subs with Chris, Adam and Danny himself making way. However Colin's niggly injury came back to haunt him after only a few minutes and Danny was back on in defence again. The half was initially much like the first as Barely threatened the box with regularity but not necessarily the goal. A stroke of luck gave them the two-goal cushion, however, when Sam's intended cross flew over the keeper and into the corner of the net.

But if Barely thought that was that, they had another think coming. Accies didn't drive all the way from Cardiff to play for an hour, and they fought hard to get back in the game, hitting both post and crossbar and drawing a smart point-blank stop from Tom and a goal-line clearing header from Andy, who was having more than a decent half down the Barely left.

Time was ticking away though, and Barely were holding firm at 3-1.

But there was still the final act to come - if this game was written by Shakespeare, it was his Hamlet rather than his Timon of Athens ( - one of the shit ones.) First Sam fouled an Accies midfielder, who took exception to the ref playing the advantage. Paul Loftus took him to task about it and the pair began an ongoing verbal battle that ran for the rest of the game, providing an intriguing and fiery subplot to an otherwise even-tempered match. Then Ian - looking for all the world like he just happened to be running across the pitch after an escaped dog - took out an Accies attacker as he surged through on goal. The ref played the letter of law and for the first time in his footballing career Goodenough had to walk.

He did it for the team, guys!

Accies were now on top as Barely, with little time to reorganise, creaked at the back. They pressured and pressured and Barely were grateful for serial interventions from the rearguard and the now standard safe handling of Tom.

In light of the chances created though, Barely did have the rub of the green. In fact you could see your face in the green when a long punt from Tom was hit first-time by an Accies defender past his own keeper. 4-1 to Barely now and surely game over?

To their credit Accies did not give up, but by now they had too much of a task, and as the ref brought the whistle to his lips, the home team accelerated - we think - into next season's fixture list with a game to spare.

Man of the Match went to Paul Loftus; presumably for his ball-winning gusto rather than his wind-up skills, and Richie and Adam ran in a close second. But as with the last two games the whole team deserved a medal for their collective effort and team ethos. Danny particularly has had to stare fate in the face, marshall his troops and force it to back down and bother someone else.

Well done gentlemen!

Jim Crowbars an Opportunity

Barely FC 5 - 3  SCS Vets

Goal: Tom

Defence: Ian G, Danny, Batts

Midfield: Adam, Richie, Jacko, Mike, Sam

Attack: Jim S, Chris

Subs: Paul T, Ian J, James, Colin

The print is still drying on last week's report but here are Barely again, building a head of steam as the season reaches it's inevitably climactic conclusion. Will they stay up, and celebrate yet another year in their 20 year plus stay in the top division? Will they go down in a blaze of belated glory? Either way, they are in the mix and have put their destiny in their own hands.

Word from the gaffers was that this would be a tricky game, and for 50 minutes it was just that... only for Barely - and Jim in particular - to turn on the style and notch up some impressive finishing. But the drama of the second half was all to come when he scored his first - giving Barely a lead with a collector's item - a header from a corner. At that point it was half-way through the first half and though SCS were shading possession, they had only forced one save of note from Tom - a sprawling left-handed dive to push the ball away for the corner. SCS were attacking in waves, but they were unable to penetrate the Barely back line, which is growing into its 3-5-2 formation. And SCS's own defence looked vulnerable to the pace and trickery of the Barely attack. As the half wore on the home team grew in confidence, only to have a mini-implosion shortly before the break.

Having finally scored with half-time looming, SCS were suddenly on top and encamped in the Barely half. Clearances were ever more desperate as the confidence proved to be fragile, and sure enough another goal came with a far-post header from a left-wing cross, sending SCS off for their oranges with their tails up. Barely, in contrast, could hardly bring themselves to speak after Danny's pep talk; tumbleweed all but blowing through the wheezy, despondent air. One or two substitutions were made and they traipsed out for the second half looking anything but vengeful and motivated.

However, as Mike has before attested, appearances can be deceiving. As he and Sam decided to yell at the team for the duration of the half (thereby giving themselves an assist of sorts) Barely set upon SCS like gangbusters, tearing at them like the last five minutes of the first half had never happened - and after their third attack they scored, Jim finishing with aplomb to put Barely level.

Belief surged through Barely - if an observer had written the game off at half-time as dead, the corpse had risen from the grave and was staggering around in midfield, kicking wildly. SCS were in no way out of it, and remained a threat, but every time Barely broke forward they looked capable of adding goals to their tally. And so they did; Adam breaking in from the left to put Jim in on goal for number three, then Jim again with a cracking finish from the edge of the box. Somewhere before, between or after those goals Chris got in on the act again, scoring with an insouciant flick after the goalkeeper had saved an effort from man-of-the-match (another walkover) - Jim.

There was time for late drama still - Sam tripped a man in the area and he probably would have got a penalty had he not dived quite so theatrically, hurling himself skyward in order to fall from the farthest possible height. In the ensuing melee/protest the game continued and SCS rifled in a late consolation.

But another game played in the right Casuals spirit - hats off to the opposition - ended, thankfully, with Barely snaffling the points. Two games to go and the thinking in the camp is one victory would do it. They're not out of the woods yet. But they are in quite a nice glade eating a bit of Kendall mint cake.

Barely Grab a Lifeline

Bathelona 1  Barely Athletic 3

Goal: Tom
Centre-backs: Ian, Danny, Batts
Wingbacks: Colin, Mike
Centre-mid: Jacko, Richie, Paul
Attack: Adam, Chris

Sub: Sam

With three tough games remaining the odds are still very much against them, but Barely handed themselves a lifeline to first division survival today with a long-awaited and much overdue first win of the season.

The team selection was a bag of pluses and minuses - still without long-term injury absentees and Barely stalwarts of the like of Sir James Fry, Mani, Jim Banton, Colin and Danny also had to contend with the absence of Jim Siemens, Barely's first choice striker. (Into his stead stepped Chris, partnering Adam upfront) On the other hand the presence of Tom in goal is always reassuring, as is the sight of Paul Loftus haring around in midfield staying - usually - just the right side of mayhem.

The home team kicked off but in short order Barely were on top. Playing very much unlike a team without a win in months, Barely - arranged in a possibly ambitious 3-5-2 by Danny - were first to every ball, it seemed, whether in the air or on the bobbly ground. They pressured the Bathelona goal without quite having the cutting edge to get the goal their play deserved. One feared that the storm would blow itself out with no reward, and Barely's season of pain and frustration would continue. But with 20 or so minutes on the clock Richie scuttled past a challenge to the byline and hooked the ball across the face of goal - it was the easiest of tap-ins for Chris, the right man in the right place, and Barely were one up.

Danny started the rolling subs with Sam coming on for Colin and right wing-back, but at this point Bathelona managed to capitalise on one of their occasional sorties forward. Having forced a corner on the right, the ball was swung into the far post where it was headed deftly into the top-corner of the goal, beyond the despairing dive of Tom and above the not-particularly-elevated head of Sam.

One each.

And so the scores remained until half-time, when Colin returned in place of Mike and Barely confirmed among themselves that despite the disappointment of conceding an equaliser, there were points to be had from this game. They just didn't suspect they would come in quite so spectacular a fashion.

When the second half started the teams were about honours even in terms of possession and goal threat, but as the minutes ticked by it was Bathelona who finally were having a period on top. They even celebrated a goal-line clearance by Sam as though they had scored, which was wasn't exactly the type of incident that Mark Lawrensen would say he's "seen them given". However Bathelona's purple patch was nullified by probably the finest Barely goal you'll have seen this season (admittedly there haven't been many). Chris took up possession in the middle of the Bathelona half and strode forward past a challenge, releasing the ball to Adam. Adam pushed it wide, past his marker and into the box, reaching the ball first and flicking it across into the danger area, where Chris was running in. It looked like the move might actually end there, as the ball came behind him, only for Chris to flick up a heel and knock the ball up over his own head - and the goalkeeper's grasp, coming to rest in the Bathelona net.

2-1 then and Barely's belief was reinvigorated. Suddenly they were back on top, with Chris and Adam combining well with Richie's surges forward. The Bathelona threat was still there, but with the clock ticking away so was their energy, and it felt that if there was another goal in the game it would probably come from Barely.

And so it was, with Chris completing his hat-trick with a cool finish over the keeper as he engineered some space for himself in the box.

The final whistle blew and a game played in great spirit, by and large despite the ref rather than because of him, concluded. Barely decamped to the pub to discuss the likelihood of survival, and the vote for man of the match was forewent as the universal agreement was that it should go to Chris. Not, as Mike authoratively clarified, simply for his goals, but for his all round play and drive on the day - serially clearing the Bathelona corners, pestering the Bathelona back line and at one point even popping up at centre-back, which is a rarity even when he's allegedly playing there.

But though Chris' award was just for all the reasons given above, it was a good day for the whole team, with Barely's first half performance in particular coming under the umbrella of 'vintage'. And who knows, with a win and three points under their belt, perhaps they have given themselves a chance of pulling off the great escape and prolonging their 1800 year stay in the Casuals top flight. The word on everyone's lips may still be relegation, but they've shortened the odds just a little...

BARELY UNABLE TO MAKE IT A BLUE MONDAY FOR EASTON

With 15 in the changing room the mood was good until it was remembered that there were not enough shirts to go around and outside the wind chill was severe enough to take the pillage out of the most enthusiastic Viking.

Without last time out MOTM Tom in goal it was volunteer time and with 13 backward steps it was a half each for Mike & Chris to take on the threat from Easton.

The game started brightly enough for Barely and although Easton were pressing there was no way past the imposing bulk of Mike in goal who repelled all with a series of tip overs and punches. Barely looked equally dangerous on the break with Jim and Adam having the legs on the Easton defence.  The deadlock was broken mid way through the first half when Jim got on the end of sharp move down the right side and a pass which split the defence - Barely's front man coolly slot past the advancing keeper.

However the lead was short-lived, as the Easton ref awarded a penalty for spot of wrestling by Ian J (hotly contested that is by this season's front runner for serial Ref baiter Ian J) 1-1.

Half time arrived with the teams equal and a change of personnel worthy of an England friendly match with Jim's mates Tom & Will on, Chris going into goal, & Jim (Batts) on. Mike, James & Adam having a rest. Danny held himself in deep reserve running the line and giving the pep talk.

The second half saw Easton take a grip on midfield that led to one-way traffic and three crosses, three goals for Easton. Barely, never a team to lie down and whimper started to claw their way back pushing the game more and more into Easton's half. Somewhere in the middle of the second half Jim and Chris's recruits fell by the wayside;– Will now warm after a 1^st half on the touchline, got even more heated, fell out with the ref and stropped off, Tom to a pulled muscle – come back Adam & James.  Another fine move down the right involving lots of player your correspondent can't remember led to the ball teed up in front of Rich Cormack to slot past the despairing keeper 2-4 and hope reared its head. More pressure and the Easton centre half's leg wrapping round Jim's chest lead to a penalty, taken by Jim but tragically turned round the post for a corner. Still Barely pressed and MOTM James crossed the ball into the hand of a Happy Monday defender – penalty number 2. Jacko took charge this time and full of precision and cunning as is his trade mark stroked the ball wide of the keeper and unfortunately the post. Hope kept its head down after this. The Barely record on penalties this season is a 25% conversion rate – practice on a Wednesday needed. Ian G has volunteered for the next spot kick if he can get that far up the pitch in time.

The game ground to an inevitable 2-4 end with Easton wrapping up the points to go mid table whilst Barely have more in common with Reading (or Bristol City).

Post game excitement surrounded, missing van keys and the confirmation that where cars are concerned Batts knows some dark skills.