AXA 3 Barely Athletic 5
LINE UP: Steve in goal, back four of Andy, Danny, Phil and Sam, Midfield of Rich, Jim, Rich and Ioan, Mani and Nick upfront.
Rolling subs from: Tom, Jerry and Lee.
With the league two games old, Barely had a W1 D0 L1 record so this game really felt like it might be a defining moment for the team in orangey-yellow and black stripes. Would they fall away as against Reunion? Or hammer out a couple of points as they had done against whoever it was they won against?
Whatever happened it looked as if the breeze would play a part as it gusted across the pitch, making the players look stoic and interlocked with destiny. Rich Cormack (grey eyes, heroic, windswept) picked his namesake Rich Sloper (blue eyes, rugged, wistful) in midfield to give it a bit of aggression as the team vowed to win for Rich Batten (blue eyes, broken arm). Rich Jackson was disappointingly nowhere to be seen, steering this particular paragraph up a narrative cul-de-sac.
The game started in brisk fashion as the AXA forwards tested the pace of Danny and Phil at the back, turning sharply on passes into their feet. As ever, they found Barely's established centre-backs no slouches and Barely held firm. More than that, they were launching rapid counter-attacks, particularly down the left where Rich (Cormack, etc) and Andy Lilford were establishing an understanding that belied the embryonic nature of their relationship. Sure enough it was Andy who wellied a ball into the back of a net from the edge of the box to give Barely the lead, and make everyone reappraise exactly what the left-back role can be.
Shortly afterwards Barely were pressurizing again and after a couple of efforts were blocked, the loose ball fell to Lilford who duly dispatched it into the goal for his second.
However a team is traditionally vulnerable after scoring, and having scored twice in succession Barely seemed twice as vulnerable as AXA did exactly the same, bringing the scores level at 2-2 as Barely suddenly looked porous at the back. In the midst of this madness both Rich Sloper and Nick had pulled their calf muscles and been replaced by Lee and Tom, and it was the latter who finished sublimely from an angle to put Barely back in front. Either shortly before or after that Jim added another cracker from outside the box and Barely found themselves 4-2 up. The game then swung this way and that like an indecisive bisexual trying to commit to a long term relationship, before half-time came and Barely realized they faced not only AXA in the second period, but also the wind.
Despite some shaky defending early on Barely held firm, the back four relishing the challenge AXA were presenting. Sam in particular was relishing it so much he decided to give the ball away as often as possible just to see if he could get it back. But when AXA did break through Steve's positioning and sticky gloves meant all their reward was a display of catching from Barely's keeper. In an attacking sense Barely were unsurprisingly less demonstrative in the second half but they still had their moments. The best of them came when Jerry (on for Ioan at half-time) jinked his way past the left-back and was brought down in the area. There was little protest from AXA when the ref pointed to the spot, and penalty-expert Jerry generously handed over duties to penalty-amateur Andy (last effort seen heading over Catbrain) to see if he could claim a hat-trick.
With Barely's lead only one goal was this a luxury they couldn't afford?
No - Andy duly thumped it past the keeper to claim a hat-trick from left back and ultimately stage a coup of the man-of-the-match award, the voting for which was bypassed in favour of some jealous taunting. But before that happened Barely saw out the game with nary a flutter, their two-goal lead taking the wind out of AXA's sails somewhat. So, despite the patchy nature of the game, a good day at the office for Barely and some cracking goals as well.
Monday 11 December 2006
Friday 8 December 2006
Barely 2 Reunion 5
Barely Line Up:
In goal: Steve
Back four: Rich, Phil, Danny, Andy
Midfield: Jerry, Sam, Jim, Rich
Attack: Mani and Nick
Rolling subs from: Dave, Lee, and Ioan.
After a few days of torrential rain the sun was shining on Bristol as the match kicked off, in much the same way it probably shone on Rome as it burned. As one might expect, the champions took the game to Barely in the opening stages. They had some well-rehearsed wing play and the flanks were where they stationed their most mobile players, so Barely's full-backs were being sorely tested. They held up.
Gaining confidence from the defence, Barely started making some inroads in attack as sweeping moves crossed the midfield and ended with Jerry or Rich (smouldering grey eyes), or just as often the swashbuckling Andy and Rich (deep blue eyes), knocking crosses into the box. But Reunion held firm - at least until a low square ball was swept home by Mani to give Barely an unlikely lead.
And having taken the lead it was suddenly Barely playing like champions as they mopped up Reunion attacks and broke into the opposition half in numbers - low numbers, admittedly, but when they include the unstoppable piston-legs of Rich (grey eyes) the long-distance engine of Andy and the I-can-knock-it-just-past-the-woodwork-from-anywhere accuracy of Mani and Nick, Reunion knew they were playing with fire. And shortly after Barely's opener they burnt their fingers and went running to mummy after conceding a second, when Rich's (blue eyes) cross was fumbled by the keeper into his own net. "The sun played a part" Rich admitted later, "But me and the sun are old mates" he added.
However Barely's delight faded quickly when Phil - hitherto the impenetrable fortress of throw-in concession - decided to vary his game with a back-pass that was marginally underhit. Steve's goalkeeping prowess was there for all to see as he smothered the ball, but it broke loose for the attacker to knock it home and make the score 2-1. And that goal was enough for Runion to raise their game and put Barely under the cosh until half-time.
Unfortunately the less said about the second half the better. Despite the introduction of Barely's own Roy Keane in Dave Williams, Barely seemed to lack fire in the second half and Reunion sensed opportunity. After a few minutes of shadowboxing they moved in for a quick one-two and twatted Barely into the floor, grabbing a 3-2 initiative even though Barely, at this point, were creating chances.
Rich (grey eyes) acted swiftly, shuffling his pack and bringing on Lee and returning Sam to the fray (perhaps deciding against returning Jim to the field whilst his pallor remained somewhat ashen.) Unfortunately neither had the impact they would have liked - watching from the left as Reunion strode through the midfield to add two more goals to the gloom before the death - which was exactly what it felt like.
As mentioned in previous posts this defeat smarted, but it must be said Union in general seemed a decent side. They just had the bad form to score 5 goals.
* * *
* The blue and grey eyes references are due to a lack of surname info, not some romantic yearning on my part. At least not now I realise Rich Cormack's eye's aren't the chocolatey brown that really floats my boat.
In goal: Steve
Back four: Rich, Phil, Danny, Andy
Midfield: Jerry, Sam, Jim, Rich
Attack: Mani and Nick
Rolling subs from: Dave, Lee, and Ioan.
After a few days of torrential rain the sun was shining on Bristol as the match kicked off, in much the same way it probably shone on Rome as it burned. As one might expect, the champions took the game to Barely in the opening stages. They had some well-rehearsed wing play and the flanks were where they stationed their most mobile players, so Barely's full-backs were being sorely tested. They held up.
Gaining confidence from the defence, Barely started making some inroads in attack as sweeping moves crossed the midfield and ended with Jerry or Rich (smouldering grey eyes), or just as often the swashbuckling Andy and Rich (deep blue eyes), knocking crosses into the box. But Reunion held firm - at least until a low square ball was swept home by Mani to give Barely an unlikely lead.
And having taken the lead it was suddenly Barely playing like champions as they mopped up Reunion attacks and broke into the opposition half in numbers - low numbers, admittedly, but when they include the unstoppable piston-legs of Rich (grey eyes) the long-distance engine of Andy and the I-can-knock-it-just-past-the-woodwork-from-anywhere accuracy of Mani and Nick, Reunion knew they were playing with fire. And shortly after Barely's opener they burnt their fingers and went running to mummy after conceding a second, when Rich's (blue eyes) cross was fumbled by the keeper into his own net. "The sun played a part" Rich admitted later, "But me and the sun are old mates" he added.
However Barely's delight faded quickly when Phil - hitherto the impenetrable fortress of throw-in concession - decided to vary his game with a back-pass that was marginally underhit. Steve's goalkeeping prowess was there for all to see as he smothered the ball, but it broke loose for the attacker to knock it home and make the score 2-1. And that goal was enough for Runion to raise their game and put Barely under the cosh until half-time.
Unfortunately the less said about the second half the better. Despite the introduction of Barely's own Roy Keane in Dave Williams, Barely seemed to lack fire in the second half and Reunion sensed opportunity. After a few minutes of shadowboxing they moved in for a quick one-two and twatted Barely into the floor, grabbing a 3-2 initiative even though Barely, at this point, were creating chances.
Rich (grey eyes) acted swiftly, shuffling his pack and bringing on Lee and returning Sam to the fray (perhaps deciding against returning Jim to the field whilst his pallor remained somewhat ashen.) Unfortunately neither had the impact they would have liked - watching from the left as Reunion strode through the midfield to add two more goals to the gloom before the death - which was exactly what it felt like.
As mentioned in previous posts this defeat smarted, but it must be said Union in general seemed a decent side. They just had the bad form to score 5 goals.
* * *
* The blue and grey eyes references are due to a lack of surname info, not some romantic yearning on my part. At least not now I realise Rich Cormack's eye's aren't the chocolatey brown that really floats my boat.
BARELY OFF TO A FLYER
Barely 3 Westbury Wanderers 1
BARELY SECURE 100% RECORD IN THE LEAGUE & 100% PENALTY RECORD (.....in the League!!!)
Well for those brave apostles who couldn't make the game and for this who did, here's a brief report.....
Time: 9.30 am. Place: in the car driving to the game. Huey and Louey consider the starting options and panic (very slightly) over the prospect of playing with only 10 men....
The news of having only 10 was received positively by the team, followed by some frenetic texting and phoning to round up extra players (to no avail). On person, who shall remain nameless, did however comment, "What a bloo*y shambles. Would never have happened in my day".
Anyway, 10.30 ish, game on. The 10 become 9. Big Lee eventually makes a start 10 mins into the game. Despite having only 10 players, Barely dominate play but concede a nicely slotted goal to Westbury Wanderers (who, despite being newly promoted, showed no nerves playing in the top flight of the Casuals League).
An early setback, but Barely continue to press and, following some neat link-up play, Lee looses his marker and slots in the equaliser from the edge of the box. All square.
The team are all playing well. Nick takes charge in goal and makes himself big (ooo er missus). Phil 'The Enforcer' and Danny 'You're not coming in if you're not on the list' shore up the defence in true a true Gandalf 'You Shall Not Pass' stylee. Andy and Sam, the full backs, have their opposing numbers in their pockets (even though their shorts have no pockets) and cause Westbury problems with pace and skill (there's just no substitute for these qualities in today's game). The Barely midfield dominated, with Lee adding his (not inconsiderable) physical presence and Jerry 'The Flyer' Gyde making some truly inspirational runs and crosses. Yes Ladies, fear not, he still has the magic! Up front, the lone striker, Marseille Mani harried the defence, showing them no mercy or chance to rest.
Barely were paying great football, using the width and creating chance after chance. Still difficult with 10 men though.......
Then, a miracle. Enter Big Tyrone - a journeyman player for AXA and Redland looking to settle a score with a player from PSST. As none of these teams were actually playing and, following a brief chat with Nick, he joined the apostles and settles his score with Westbury players instead. Kind of a case of 'if you can't kick the one you want, kick the one you're with'. Now with Tyrone, Lee and Phil in the site, Westbury could be forgiven for thinking that they were facing a rugby front row rather than footballers.
Half time 1:1
Second half and Barely continue to dazzle! Andy, breaking in from the left beats 2 or 3 (may even have been 4) and slots the ball home left of a flailing keeper. 2:1 for Barely. Then, 10 minutes from time, Rich makes a characteristic burst from midfield and is scythed down in the box. Clear penalty. But who will take it with so many players still psychologically scarred form the experience of the cup game? One man stepped forward, Jerry. He eyed the keeper and buried it top left. Keeper no chance. 3:1 to Barely. Full time.
Man of the Match - 3-way tie between Rich, Jerry and Andy. (Jerry and Andy then generously conceded the title to Rich).
All in all, a great game. Westbury Wanderers were honourable, competitive and played true to the Casuals ethos. Decent men and fine fellows! All Barely players had fine games. The main thing was though that all supported each other, with the only comment and shouts being positive and encouraging. That made a big difference (along with the result!) and, as a result, all enjoyed the game. Which is, after all, the whole point of playing. Top Barely spirit was shown with a victory carved against the odds.
BARELY SECURE 100% RECORD IN THE LEAGUE & 100% PENALTY RECORD (.....in the League!!!)
Well for those brave apostles who couldn't make the game and for this who did, here's a brief report.....
Time: 9.30 am. Place: in the car driving to the game. Huey and Louey consider the starting options and panic (very slightly) over the prospect of playing with only 10 men....
The news of having only 10 was received positively by the team, followed by some frenetic texting and phoning to round up extra players (to no avail). On person, who shall remain nameless, did however comment, "What a bloo*y shambles. Would never have happened in my day".
Anyway, 10.30 ish, game on. The 10 become 9. Big Lee eventually makes a start 10 mins into the game. Despite having only 10 players, Barely dominate play but concede a nicely slotted goal to Westbury Wanderers (who, despite being newly promoted, showed no nerves playing in the top flight of the Casuals League).
An early setback, but Barely continue to press and, following some neat link-up play, Lee looses his marker and slots in the equaliser from the edge of the box. All square.
The team are all playing well. Nick takes charge in goal and makes himself big (ooo er missus). Phil 'The Enforcer' and Danny 'You're not coming in if you're not on the list' shore up the defence in true a true Gandalf 'You Shall Not Pass' stylee. Andy and Sam, the full backs, have their opposing numbers in their pockets (even though their shorts have no pockets) and cause Westbury problems with pace and skill (there's just no substitute for these qualities in today's game). The Barely midfield dominated, with Lee adding his (not inconsiderable) physical presence and Jerry 'The Flyer' Gyde making some truly inspirational runs and crosses. Yes Ladies, fear not, he still has the magic! Up front, the lone striker, Marseille Mani harried the defence, showing them no mercy or chance to rest.
Barely were paying great football, using the width and creating chance after chance. Still difficult with 10 men though.......
Then, a miracle. Enter Big Tyrone - a journeyman player for AXA and Redland looking to settle a score with a player from PSST. As none of these teams were actually playing and, following a brief chat with Nick, he joined the apostles and settles his score with Westbury players instead. Kind of a case of 'if you can't kick the one you want, kick the one you're with'. Now with Tyrone, Lee and Phil in the site, Westbury could be forgiven for thinking that they were facing a rugby front row rather than footballers.
Half time 1:1
Second half and Barely continue to dazzle! Andy, breaking in from the left beats 2 or 3 (may even have been 4) and slots the ball home left of a flailing keeper. 2:1 for Barely. Then, 10 minutes from time, Rich makes a characteristic burst from midfield and is scythed down in the box. Clear penalty. But who will take it with so many players still psychologically scarred form the experience of the cup game? One man stepped forward, Jerry. He eyed the keeper and buried it top left. Keeper no chance. 3:1 to Barely. Full time.
Man of the Match - 3-way tie between Rich, Jerry and Andy. (Jerry and Andy then generously conceded the title to Rich).
All in all, a great game. Westbury Wanderers were honourable, competitive and played true to the Casuals ethos. Decent men and fine fellows! All Barely players had fine games. The main thing was though that all supported each other, with the only comment and shouts being positive and encouraging. That made a big difference (along with the result!) and, as a result, all enjoyed the game. Which is, after all, the whole point of playing. Top Barely spirit was shown with a victory carved against the odds.
BARELY'S CUP FALLETH OVER
Opening game of season ends in fiasco after penalty panto.
BARELY 2 SWIFT FC 2
Swift FC win on penalties AET.
Line up: Has been lost in the mists of time. Considering the end to this game, that's no bad thing.
Barely's first game of the season was a cup tie and they took to the field speculating that perhaps their name was on the cup this year. Two hours later they were holding the wooden spoon, standing in the corner and facing the wall.
This report has been written retroactively so exact details are hazy and facts may be as wayward as a Barely penalty. But we do know that thanks to Rich Cormack and Jim Fry (from 30 yards according to Jim ) Barely surged into a 2-1 lead by half-time, although the team were under no illusions about how they were playing, which was mediocre at best. Dave Williams tried to grab the team by the scruff of the neck with a few choice verbals but unfortunately his well-intentioned 'stick and stick' approach didn't have the desired effect. Barely were clearly more of a 'carrot and backrub' team.
The second half was pretty much a rearguard action by Barely and they were grateful for Steve's heroics in goal when saved a penalty to keep the team in it at 2-2. Somehow they survived 30 minutes of extra time and, to the outrage of the groundsman, settled down for a penalty shootout to see who would go through to the next round.
Sam set the tone when Barely's first penalty was at what they call 'a decent height for the keeper' - ie about the length of his arms from his body. When Jim and Rich missed the goal entirely Swift had a 2-0 shootout lead and a penalty in hand. Up stepped man-of-the-match Steve to save three pennos in succession - whilst Jerry and Dave dragged Barely back into it with their spotkicks despatched with aplomb. But moving into sudden death at two-all, Barely laid on a display of such ineptitude that spectators turned away in embarrassment - Andy, Ioan, and someone else (Who? For some reason no-one is coming forward on this) all managed to smack the ball high over the bar whilst only Tom and Nick scored again for Barely.
That the shootout went as long as it did is entirely the responsibility of Steve, who kept prolonging the humilation by saving the Swift penalties. What he was playing at we'll never know.
By the time nine penalties had been missed of saved Swift FC staggered from the wreckage with a victory that they probably didn't boast about when they got home, but they nonetheless deserved. Barely were out of the cup at the first attempt, and would have to 'concentrate on the league'. As they say.
*
Any errors in this report are entirely trivial when you look at the bigger picture.
BARELY 2 SWIFT FC 2
Swift FC win on penalties AET.
Line up: Has been lost in the mists of time. Considering the end to this game, that's no bad thing.
Barely's first game of the season was a cup tie and they took to the field speculating that perhaps their name was on the cup this year. Two hours later they were holding the wooden spoon, standing in the corner and facing the wall.
This report has been written retroactively so exact details are hazy and facts may be as wayward as a Barely penalty. But we do know that thanks to Rich Cormack and Jim Fry (from 30 yards according to Jim ) Barely surged into a 2-1 lead by half-time, although the team were under no illusions about how they were playing, which was mediocre at best. Dave Williams tried to grab the team by the scruff of the neck with a few choice verbals but unfortunately his well-intentioned 'stick and stick' approach didn't have the desired effect. Barely were clearly more of a 'carrot and backrub' team.
The second half was pretty much a rearguard action by Barely and they were grateful for Steve's heroics in goal when saved a penalty to keep the team in it at 2-2. Somehow they survived 30 minutes of extra time and, to the outrage of the groundsman, settled down for a penalty shootout to see who would go through to the next round.
Sam set the tone when Barely's first penalty was at what they call 'a decent height for the keeper' - ie about the length of his arms from his body. When Jim and Rich missed the goal entirely Swift had a 2-0 shootout lead and a penalty in hand. Up stepped man-of-the-match Steve to save three pennos in succession - whilst Jerry and Dave dragged Barely back into it with their spotkicks despatched with aplomb. But moving into sudden death at two-all, Barely laid on a display of such ineptitude that spectators turned away in embarrassment - Andy, Ioan, and someone else (Who? For some reason no-one is coming forward on this) all managed to smack the ball high over the bar whilst only Tom and Nick scored again for Barely.
That the shootout went as long as it did is entirely the responsibility of Steve, who kept prolonging the humilation by saving the Swift penalties. What he was playing at we'll never know.
By the time nine penalties had been missed of saved Swift FC staggered from the wreckage with a victory that they probably didn't boast about when they got home, but they nonetheless deserved. Barely were out of the cup at the first attempt, and would have to 'concentrate on the league'. As they say.
*
Any errors in this report are entirely trivial when you look at the bigger picture.
Player Profiles
BARELY ATHLETIC PLAYER PROFILES
STEVE “ZANNUSSI” PINNELL
Position: Midfield / Forward
Age range 35-50
A technically brilliant goalkeeper. His great size belies his agility and cat-like reflexes. Stands up well with safe hands and he dominates his box. Unfortunately plays right wing.
IOAN ‘NOBBY’ WILLIAMS
Position: Forward / Right Back
Age range 35-50
A recent convert from attack to defence he brings all the strikers guile to showing opposing forwards the way to goal. Longstanding Chairman of the board who has survived numerous disinterested attempts to oust him.
QUENTIN “FORTESCUE” ALSOPP
Position: Midfield / Defence
Age range 35-50
Skilful, fast and occasionally furious. A player of great vision (despite the specs). Reads the game beautifully and organises those around him. An integral part of the team when his wife, Katherine, lets him play.
PHIL “THE ENFORCER” WALSH
Position: Defence
Age range 35-50
Carved from granite with pointy elbows and very big boots. Not renowned for his speed but gets there as quick as he can and makes an impression. Steadfast and resolute in defence.
JOHN ‘SUNSHINE’ OVERFIELD
Position: Goalkeeper
Age range 35-50
A popular member of the team, which has nothing to do with his willingness to go in goal. Frequently our last line of defence and occasionally our only line of defence, John's ballet like grace in goal belies his thuggish appearance.
.JPG)
NICK “STRIKER” AMBLER
Position: Utility
Age range 35-50
Winner for several years of ‘Most Extravagant Claim of the Season’ Award that of ‘I’m a goal a game man’. Happy playing up front even when selected at right back. Versatile utility player and team historian/statistician. True clubman.
MANROUF “THIERRY” CHANFI
Position: Midfield / Forward
Age range 35-50
One of our overseas mercenaries. Plays with typical Gallic commitment. If he can be arsed. Fleet of foot and gob. His tastes in world music much like his football talent - wide, patchy and decidedly odd with occasional flashes of class.
JERRY “THE GENERAL” GYDE
Position: Libero / Sweeper
Age range 35-50
Manager , strategist, tactician, motivator. A rapier amongst broadswords. Stylish with more than a hint of Continental flair and a rock solid sweeper. Or so he keeps telling us. He really does go on!
“BATTLING” BOB LYNNE
Position: Forward
Age range 35-50
A player of great skill and passion. A bit too much really. Likes to beat a player several times just to make sure. Enjoys conversations with both the opposition and the Ref. Back to full form now he’s had both knees replaced.
STEVE “ZANNUSSI” PINNELLPosition: Midfield / Forward
Age range 35-50
A technically brilliant goalkeeper. His great size belies his agility and cat-like reflexes. Stands up well with safe hands and he dominates his box. Unfortunately plays right wing.
IOAN ‘NOBBY’ WILLIAMSPosition: Forward / Right Back
Age range 35-50
A recent convert from attack to defence he brings all the strikers guile to showing opposing forwards the way to goal. Longstanding Chairman of the board who has survived numerous disinterested attempts to oust him.
QUENTIN “FORTESCUE” ALSOPP
Position: Midfield / Defence
Age range 35-50
Skilful, fast and occasionally furious. A player of great vision (despite the specs). Reads the game beautifully and organises those around him. An integral part of the team when his wife, Katherine, lets him play.
PHIL “THE ENFORCER” WALSHPosition: Defence
Age range 35-50
Carved from granite with pointy elbows and very big boots. Not renowned for his speed but gets there as quick as he can and makes an impression. Steadfast and resolute in defence.
JOHN ‘SUNSHINE’ OVERFIELDPosition: Goalkeeper
Age range 35-50
A popular member of the team, which has nothing to do with his willingness to go in goal. Frequently our last line of defence and occasionally our only line of defence, John's ballet like grace in goal belies his thuggish appearance.
.JPG)
NICK “STRIKER” AMBLERPosition: Utility
Age range 35-50
Winner for several years of ‘Most Extravagant Claim of the Season’ Award that of ‘I’m a goal a game man’. Happy playing up front even when selected at right back. Versatile utility player and team historian/statistician. True clubman.
MANROUF “THIERRY” CHANFIPosition: Midfield / Forward
Age range 35-50
One of our overseas mercenaries. Plays with typical Gallic commitment. If he can be arsed. Fleet of foot and gob. His tastes in world music much like his football talent - wide, patchy and decidedly odd with occasional flashes of class.
JERRY “THE GENERAL” GYDEPosition: Libero / Sweeper
Age range 35-50
Manager , strategist, tactician, motivator. A rapier amongst broadswords. Stylish with more than a hint of Continental flair and a rock solid sweeper. Or so he keeps telling us. He really does go on!
Position: Forward
Age range 35-50
A player of great skill and passion. A bit too much really. Likes to beat a player several times just to make sure. Enjoys conversations with both the opposition and the Ref. Back to full form now he’s had both knees replaced.
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